Selective Frequency Distortion
"Don't worry," you said, "hindi na ako maiilang tulad ng dati." But you dropped the line before, and somehow my mind always shifted back. You tried to reassure me, but somehow I wasn't.But you were right; things didn't change after all. I thought we'd fall apart again, but somehow we remained just as close as we were before that, if not, I feel, grow even closer.
So I didn't have to agree, did I? But somehow, I was too bothered. I wanted to be "us", but I didn't want to get in your way.
"Let's just forget about it." I paused. "I've been thinking about it, and I think you're right," I blurted out, not knowing what to say next.
We laughed.
"Don't worry," you repeated from the last.
"I won't," I chuckled. "I just wanted to secure that invitation. At least invited na ule ako for sure."
We both laughed harder.
"Pero alam mo..." you began, not wanting to continue.
"What?" I prodded, after three minutes.
"... masasabi ko na mas matino ka compared sa iba."
I stopped, somehow disbelieving.
"Malay mo......" you trailed off.
We both fell silent.
"Pero anyways, let's forget about it na nga," you recovered first. As usual, you had me disarmed from the get-go.
We can no longer return after all, and things between us have changed. We were more than friends, but we were less than "that", so where were we?
"I hate you," I said jokingly. "You could've told me sooner."
But somehow, I guess, you were just as clueless as I was.
I arrived - three more years - and you agreed. "Friends 'til then."
I doubt we'd ever forget about it. But we can do that, can't we? You forgetting me saying that and me forgetting you saying the same thing. You always joked you had a short memory, after all. Let's just forget I needed closure, and you needed time.
posted by Dexter @ 3:14 PM
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